I used to think I had to pick one lane.

Be constantly hustling, pushing for more, getting shit done (and a little in-your-face if I'm being honest) or be the deeply present, ease-filled woman who trusts everything will work out (and spends a lot of time barefoot and vibing).

But life - at least a life in full bloom - doesn’t work that way.

I planned six weeks of travel. The kind of adventure that used to light me up. The kind of trip I’ve dreamed about, planned for, and always loved. It’s something I do. It’s even who I am.

But when I let go of the “should” and got honest about what I actually needed, the answer was clear:

I didn’t need more movement, more excitement. I needed something else entirely.

The more I lean into loving myself exactly as I am, the more I reconnect with the things that lit me up before. Before I saw every skill or interest as something that needed to be profitable. Before I let labels and expectations tell me how to show up. Before I let the noise (and fear) drown out my true desires.

And I have to ask (writing that made me feel like Carrie Bradshaw staring at the camera window, I'm really having a tv icon moment here, friends)…

What if we could build the life we’ve always dreamed of - not by forcing it, but by simply being who we are, without apology?

I think it's important for us all to be able to say "I'm on a journey, I'm still learning, and I'm ok with that."

Your therapist, your coach, your mentor - the things we love about people we look to for support is rarely (NEVER?) their perfection. It's their transformation. And the way they carry themselves through to the other side.

The year had some amazing, incredible, and truly tender moments for which I am endlessly grateful. And I definitely invited myself (and was invited by the universe) into a more conscious, expanded, and even embodied, version of myself.

But it also felt a little like I took my life like a handbag and shook it upside down to clear it out.

And start fresh.

Which maybe isn’t the worst thing?